Yesterday I had my mind and body analysed by a woman I’ve only ever met once. I stood in a room with her in my underwear, feeling completely vulnerable as she studied my shape, size and structure, which, according to the International Association of Psychosomatic Therapy, have been determined by my genetics, environment and emotional state. The Association states that ‘face and body analysis techniques enable practitioners to readily identify imbalances in the body, which provide an indication of the client’s repetitive emotional and cognitive behaviours.’
I had no idea what to expect going into this psychosomatic therapy session. I hadn’t even researched it before I went. I thought the woman would look at my face and tell me a few interesting quirks about myself, like ‘that line means this’ and ‘that freckle means that’, but I never knew she would reach so far into my soul and reveal so many truths. It was like she knew me. It was confronting. It was eye opening. It left me feeling emotional and in real, desperate need of change. It’s like everything she said, I already knew about myself deep down, but to have a stranger acknowledge these deep, hidden truths? That was something else.Everything she revealed was so accurate. Here’s what happened:
First, I stood with my ankles in line with a silver ball that was attached to a string hanging down from the ceiling. The therapist analysed the way I stood and whether I leaned forward or back, the ways my arms and hands fell by my side, the space between my feet, the shape of my body, the flesh on my sternum, the size of my wrists and ankles, the arch in my feet and how I walked. Then she analysed my face and determined where my eyes went when I stared straight ahead, and if I tended to shift my glance to the left or the right. She looked at the way I parted my hair, how big my forehead was, the symmetry of my features.
And this is what she said (she said a lot, but this is what stuck):
She said my wide and open fore head showed I had a mental drive pushing forward from my masculine side (did you know we all have a feminine side and a masculine side?!) and that I had a good mental capacity with a propensity to analyse (correct). She said my angle of gaze when contemplating a question showed it rose up and to the right, showing again my mental drive in the masculine zone. When I asked her to explain this feminine/masculine whatever-it-was, she said my face and body revealed my soft, sensitive feminine side – my eyes showed the great depth of my emotion, and I had an elegant, soft nature – but I tended to use my masculine side more (it even came down to the side I parted my hair) because I was afraid of revealing to others who I really was. I was afraid of revealing my sensitivity, of being too open, too raw, too honest. And I have to say, I agree.
When it came to the way I stood, which was leaning slightly to the front of the string and silver ball, she said I pushed through in life to succeed – I didn’t find life a walk in the park. Then she looked at my throat chakra and said my slim neck showed I could express myself well when I choose to, but the two horizontal creases across my throat showcased my propensity to hold back my vocal expression, preferring to wait and hear what others have to say first. This is so true. I am always afraid to speak up, especially at work. But why?
Next was my heart chakra. She said the slight raised area in the centre of my upper chest reflected that at times I felt I needed to protect my heart. She also said my small chest region reflected a lack of sensitivity and nurturing at an early age of my growth. Now, I know I received a lot of love growing up, and mum would be horrified if I told her about my heart chakra, but when I think about it, I have always been an extremely sensitive person and my dad is not the most sensitive man. Mum knows that. My brother and sister know that. We all know that. He’s rough around the edges, always needs to be right. My mum has always been my best friend, but my dad? We’ve had our problems. Never seen eye to eye. It’s true – I was too sensitive for him and him being the extremely masculine, tough guy he was, didn’t know how to reach out to a such a sensitive soul.
It felt odd standing there while my body was being looked at and touched and scrutinised. Next, I was told about my solar plexus chakra, the chakra that represents personal identity and power (ego and confidence). I was told the curving of my hips tapered in at the waist, showing a slight restriction in energy flow from my solar plexus up through my upper chakras, which illustrated a tendency to struggle with my personal identity and feelings of self-doubt and lack of confidence. This woman, this beacon of light, said I might also feel that I sometimes bent over backwards for people that didn’t always show their appreciation. I totally relate to everything this chakra revealed. I do have self-doubt, I do struggle with personal identity. I do lack confidence. I wish I could find a way to accept myself, give myself more credit. But how?
Next I learned about the sacral chakra, the melting pot of intuition, sensuality, sexuality and creativity. I was told I have a lot of unused potential in life. My creative base is full of potency – it just needs direction and confidence to let it flow over. I was told when the fuller hips move up and dip into a slender upper torso, it shows potency and drive is restricted. She said my sacral chakra was holding me back in life due to a lack of confidence and fear of moving forward. But why? Why, why, why? Why am I so afraid? I’m 31 years old – Shouldn’t I at least have a little bit of confidence in myself and the direction I’m headed in life by now? I want to unleash my unused potential more than anything. I want my creativity to flow over. What’s stopping it? Why do I feel so stuck? I can’t help but feel something isn’t right. This path I’m on – my job, my goals, my life. Is it the right path? I’m not so sure. What is it about my life that is restricting my creativity?
Finally, she told me about the base chakra, which reflects my vital life force, support, stability and grounding. She said I had good grounding and a practical nature. She said my straight stance revealed I do have drive when I apply myself to what I want – I might just feel at present that I am adrift, not sure of where I am heading. Adrift, always adrift – that’s me, for sure, without a doubt. As she was analysing me she kept going back to my knees. She couldn’t work them out. But then she said they had a slight locked appearance which again showed I held myself back in life from my full potential. And then she went back to my childhood again, saying a slight collapse in the left heel of my ankle/heel area when viewed from behind showed I might have felt a lack of emotional support from a parent growing up. Again, this is my father she is talking about. Finally, just to really drive home the fact I’m adrift and lacking confidence and unsure and uncertain, she said my feet had a slight coolness to the touch and there was a slight clutching of the toes in my left foot, reflecting a feeling of stagnation and a holding back in life.
After our session, we sat down and talked everything through. She told me I had a strong and vibrant body with a warm and gentle personality. She said there was much depth to me, and that I had sad eyes. Of all the chakras, it was my sacral chakra she came back to, the great untapped potential I had inside of me. She said I needed to build up my confidence and become aware of my creative potency. She said it was time to throw out the fear and self-doubt in my thoughts as they did not serve me.
I knew all of this deep down. I’ve been trying to work on all these things over the years but it’s so hard. It’s a work in progress. But I feel I should be better at it by by. How do I get rid of these negative thoughts that cause so much of my fear and self-doubt? How do I stop them so that I can change my life? After this psychosomatic therapy session I realised it was time. Time to step out and live my life to my full potential. Something needs to change. And it will. I also promise to embrace my feminine side. There is nothing wrong with being too open, too raw, too honest. Femininity is a beautiful thing. I want to let mine shine. I want to be me. I want to be unapologetically me. I will find her and once I do, I believe my creativity and all of the truths I’ve been hiding deep inside of myself for all of this time will bloom and I will no longer be afraid.